I Like This Reality-Cluster. It Has Angles and Everything!

I read The Next #1 today, and I really liked it. So much so, that I'm already hoping for an ongoing. What's that you say? I'm jumping the gun a bit? A single issue isn't exactly the best measure of the future quality of a series?

I guess I'm just a sucker for-

See through dogs

A super powered Mount Rushmore

Extra-dimensional weirdos who run up the sides of buildings

And dialogue like this...

and this.

Plus, you get a Superman/Metron team-up and a reference to the Legion of Superheroes thrown in for no extra charge. What's not to like?

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

Jack Kirby- master of the three panel transformation.

Creepiest $#!t What You Ever Did See, pt.1

A gang of Zombie Circus Midgets.

Let's all thank Mr. Powell for the nightmares that are sure to follow.

from The Goon # 18

Always Take Care...

When meeting the Hemophiliac people of Bloodblister 9.

Captain Atom's Excellent Adventure

Of Rainbow Frogs and Monkey-Spiders

I tried describing this and my brain almost exploded. Just make sure you do a crossword puzzle or watch PBS or something after you read this to balance things out. I'm pretty sure my IQ has dropped several points in the last few minutes. Enjoy.

Whale's Vagina, 2006

San Diego was actually pretty fun. Aside from the long lines and occasional smelly guy, I'd have to say it was almost worth the outrageous amount of money spent to get there. I got to meet some cool artists and watch some interesting panels.

At one point, a bounty was put on my head by an irate, Imperial Hotdog on a Stick vendor. Something about asking for too many mustard packets, or something. I was able to bribe myself out of it by handing over my tickets for the Stan Lee signing.

When DarthVader found out about the incident, he was pretty embarrassed. The Dark Lord apologized and somehow managed to get my hotel room upgraded. He presented me with some complimetary Starbucks coupons and even arranged for an armed escort for the duration of the convention.

The thing that sucked most, besides the heatwave, was that Ramona Fradon had to cancel. I hope she's well. Seeing Ted Kord up and alive, however, almost made up for it. He was there with his girlfriend, Catwoman, who I was not able to get a picture of.

So how's it feel to be among the living once more?

"Huh...Oh...Oh yeah. Um...It's pretty cool I guess."
You and Catwoman been an item for very long?
"For about, uh...fifty-two weeks now. I think."

Parking sucks. Did you bring the bug?

"Yeah. We just walked from our hotel. Had to leave the ride back home. Maybe next year though... I gotta go."

Most everyone I did meet was very nice and willing to speak about their work. The one exception was a certain silver-age great who shall remain nameless. As expected, from stories and interviews I'd read, he seemed like kind of a dick. Although, I do have to say, I got to see him do a sketch for someone and I was very impressed. The dude's still an amazing artist.

The two nicest guys I met were Paul Chadwick and Zander Cannon . Both were very giving with their time and Paul Chadwick even did a quick little Concrete sketch when I asked him to sign a book.

Some other famous people I met-

I helped Optimus Prime find the closest bathroom.

Sponge Bob said something incredibly inappropriate which I refuse to repeat here. In front of a group of children, no less.

I'm pretty sure Mystique tried to lift my wallet.

Turns out that whole animosity thing is just an act. These guys are pretty tight, actually.

This loser just wouldn't shut up about some guy named Ventura or something. His girlfriend was nice, though, I think she may have been a dude. Anyway, they saved my seat at the Adult Swim Panel while I got a peanut butter smoothie.

I can now say, with about 90% accuracy, that Chewbacca is a Right Guard man.

Tomorrow, I should be back to my regular blogging schedule.

Up, Up, And Away!

I'll be in San Diego for the next week or so. It's my first convention and my first trip out west. Any of you guys going? Been before? Know any good places to eat? Let me know. My knowledge of California is taken almost entirely from issues of West Coast Avengers and episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and CHiPs, so I'm sure it'll be a learning experience.

My lack of a laptop might put me out of commission for a while, but expect detailed reports when I return. I plan on interviewing as many costumed conventioneers as possible. The only rule is they have to answer any questions in character. If you can think of any questions you'd like to ask your favorite superhero, let me know.

Flight Rings Are for Losers

Pay the Man

Last time, Kurt had to collect on a loan. The guy came up short, so...